found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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