Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
