Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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