Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
