she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize