you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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