It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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