Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
