The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
