Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
