I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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