redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
