I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
