absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
