I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize
