Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
