its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
wat bout pragnant strippers??
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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