grandma shit on top of the toilet
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
