i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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