Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
