Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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