I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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