I like my sex mixed with concussions.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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