Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
