i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
