hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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