Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I enjoy the company of your penis
If I had your ass I would rule the world
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
