I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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