but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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