and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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