she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
