R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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