porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
A bitchslap is in order.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
