I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
