I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
