If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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