i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
