He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Randomize
