how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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