none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
