Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
