you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
