i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
