I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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