Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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