i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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