so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
