Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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