Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
