He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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